I Thought This Was Pretty Funny, Too

"It has come to my attention that Sam Logan has called me out to start a webcomic rivalry! Now that we are HELLA RIVALS I can confide in you, my trusty readers, that Mr. Logan is a fraud, a coward, and a villain most nefarious. He forces innocent orphaned children to draw his comic strip for him, in return for nothing but beatings and spite! He thought napalm was a pretty good idea! He glares at babies until they cry!"